we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
