ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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