went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
