I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
