You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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