I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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