Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
