i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
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