I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
