Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
