it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
