Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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