Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
