going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize