At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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