Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
there was a trapeze. enough said
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
