Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
