No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
