he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
