if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
