Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
