Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
