god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
