my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Randomize
