I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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