you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize