we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
You left your phone here
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