That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
