help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
