I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
