I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
