You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
