You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
