im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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