The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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