Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
