she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
