i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
if only i could text you this smell
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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