My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize
