brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize