That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize