So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
