he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
