I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'm bleeding and have questions
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize