we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
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