Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize