my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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