so explain again why im purple
no
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
