I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Are we still banned from the library?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
