At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
NoShamevember. You game?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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